As if divorce isn’t difficult enough, there are some couples who will be considering it or going through the process around the most romantic holiday of the year: Valentine’s Day. It can be tough to watch others celebrating with dinner, wine, roses – or maybe even an engagement – when you’ve hit a rough patch with your own relationship.
It might come as some consolation to know that you’re not alone, however. According to the New York Post, divorce lawyers experience an increase of up to 40 percent in divorce filings in the first few weeks of every year, as compared to the previous six months. Though you may not be able to get away from the hype, a few tips may help you make it through February 14th. Plus, you’ll soon realize you’re in good company when you look at some other interesting trends and statistics on Valentine’s Day and divorce.
Data and Trends That May Surprise You: Overall, the statistics on divorce and Valentine’s Day are noteworthy because the holiday bears a mathematical relationship with both the beginning AND end of marriages. In covering a study conducted by German researchers, news outlet Bloomberg reported that:
- People plan weddings up to 500 percent more often February 14th, other holidays, and other memorable occasions, such as consecutive numbered dates;
- Search engines activity surges around Valentine’s Day with people looking up keywords related to the divorce process;
- Those who do get married on notable dates are 18-36 percent more likely to initiate divorce proceedings within the following five years; and,
- A few years later, as couples are approaching their 10th anniversary, approximately 21 percent of all people married on February 14th were headed to or involved in divorce proceedings.
Based upon these and other findings, the researchers noted several important trends. For one, many couples who divorced after being married on a key date weren’t well-matched. Another indicator pointed out that the marriage was the first for a relatively high percentage of these couples. Interestingly, there was also a link between the date of the event and how well it was attended. Many potential guests have a conflict during the biggest holidays, making them less likely to RSVP NO. When a wedding suffers from low attendance, spouses are more likely to call it quits later.
Get Through Valentine’s Day with Some Helpful Tips: The flower, chocolate, and jewelry ads may get to you, so it’s understandable that you’ll reach out to family and friends for advice. You’re smart to take advantage of this support system, but you may need additional guidance from other sources. One of your first priorities should be retaining a New York divorce lawyer as soon as you think divorce may be imminent. Your attorney will explain relevant legal matters and advise you on important issues that affect asset division, spousal support, and issues related to minor children.
Some additional recommendations to get you through Valentine’s Day include:
- Don’t get too emotional about your divorce, as your future is at stake. You need to keep in mind your divorce-related goals and work with your lawyer to achieve them.
- Always remember that New York divorce laws apply the same to any divorce, any time of year.
- Focus on your children, if any, when going through the divorce process. Your past with your soon-to-be-ex-spouse shouldn’t affect parent-child relationships.
- Keep in mind that New York’s divorce statute allows for marital settlement agreements, which might be appropriate when parties can compromise on divorce matters. Instead of a protracted legal battle, you can execute an agreement that becomes part of your divorce decree.
- Seek help from health care providers and well-being professionals when you need extra support. Group sessions and talk therapy can fill the emotional gaps.
Contact a New York Divorce Attorney for Assistance with the Process
It may seem depressing to be going through divorce around Valentine’s Day, especially when others are making reservations at cozy restaurants and buying up greeting cards. However, the prospect of a fresh start can put a positive spin on your situation. Plus, when you have an experienced divorce lawyer to advocate on your behalf, you can feel confident that your interests will be protected throughout the process.
For more information on how we can assist with divorce at any time of year, please contact The Mandel Law Firm. You can reach our office by calling (646) 770-3868 or visiting our website to schedule a consultation. We can explain divorce proceedings and help you understand what to expect once we review your unique circumstances.